Well.
Yep…those were the Oscars. Not to wish for the “ooh, heads are going to roll for that one” moments, or anything, but couldn’t Christine Lahti have, I don’t know, gotten stuck in the bathroom? Cher in a dominatrix costume? Dead-swan dress? Anything? This was a year of genuinely good movies and, apparently, even better behavior: not a glitch, not an embarrassing outfit, not a naked person in sight. Just Jon Stewart and his Gaydolf Titler joke.
If you didn’t actually feel like sitting through the three-and-a-half-hour ceremony, there were a few minor upsets, and by “upsets” I mean “circumstances in which CH’s predicted nominee did not win”: Tilda Swinton for Michael Clayton, for example, and No Country for Old Men’s victory over There Will Be Blood, which was beginning to win prediction pools the way Barack Obama wins primaries. In the Best Song category–which actually, for once, featured songs that one might call best–Irish musicians Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova gave the best acceptance-speech moment of the evening by being beside themselves with excitement and general adorability. Exactly how cute were they? Stewart invited Irglova back out to finish her speech when it was cut off by the music. You might say you’ve captured the heart of America when a man who gets paid to make fun of people tells the music to lay off and let you talk.
Other than that, though…the men wore black, with no lapel notches; the women wore column dresses with flowy hems; the Daniel Day-Lewis won Best Actor (no crazy Forest Whitaker action this year. What is this, the People’s Choice Awards?). Stewart made the best of a sketchy situation. All was as it should have been, probably.
Now. What’s next?
Oscars, Academy Awards, Tilda Swinton, Daniel Day-Lewis, Daniel Day Lewis, Jon Stewart, There Will Be Blood, No Country for Old Men
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