Cinema Hype

I’ve sort of wanted to be BFFs with comedian/actor/woman-about-town Charlyne Yi for awhile now. You might remember her one-episode stint as Grace Park, Kenneth’s Jerry Maguire-misquoting love, on an old episode of 30 Rock (I tried to find an embeddable video of this, as it’s one of my favorite 30R moments ever, but was foiled by the weak-but-apparently-not-that-weak copyright law on the internets); she also pals around with Judd Apatow’s pack (”Apatown,” apparently) and turns up in the odd movie. Now her own movie, Paper Heart, has won the Waldo Salt Screenwriting Award at Sundance, and is due out in August. It’s almost too coyly cute to be believed:

Doesn’t it look adorable, and yet also infuriatingly cute? The question here may be phrased in terms of another hipster touchstone movie: will Paper Hearts be like the first ten minutes of Juno (i.e. unwatchably twee) or like the last hour and a half (honest and funny and kind of a heartbreaker)? Alternatively, which will wear out first: Michael Cera’s charm or his penchant for playing awkwardly lovable young men? (You’d think we’d be getting towards the end of that particular rope, but the facts indicate otherwise.) I bet it also has a killer soundtrack.

Paper Heart is a “hybrid documentary”—not a mockumentary, but a mix of fiction and documentary. One assumes that the road-trip footage, and maybe the parts with her friends/crew, are the unscripted part, and that the Yi/Cera storyline (they play themselves) came with at least some forethought, though it’s hard to tell where that particular line sits—which is probably the point. Either way, I’m excited to see more of Yi’s work out there. And, hey, I still want to hang out. Even if you don’t like hair-braiding and boy-story-telling, I’m always up for a good script-polishing session! Call me!

Charlyne Yi, Paper Heart, Michael Cera, Sundance, Waldo Salt Screenwriting Award, hipster movies, Juno

Well.

So that’s over.

Is it all right if we all just breathe a collective sigh of relief? This year’s Oscar season felt, among all the glamor and the drama and the fun of choosing picks, like a long drawn-out brawl and much ado about nothing. It seems like most people were surprisingly happy with the ceremony itself—not a harsh word against Hugh Jackman all day—and that’s more than the Academy has said for itself in awhile. Kudos, all; now shall we all take a vacation?

Or just look at what’s coming up instead? Here’s the montage of upcoming releases they played at the end of the ceremony (nice touch, Academy!):

I almost don’t want to ruin this by talking about it. There’ll be plenty of time for dissection later. For now, just sit back, relax, and take a look at all of the good things to come. I think we’ve all earned it.

Oscars, Academy Awards, 2009 releases, new movies 2009, 2009 clip reel

Okay, we’re in it for the long haul, gang. Not much longer now.

Awww, I kind of like the In Memoriam montage. And I like Queen Latifah. I feel like these two things make some kind of a weird literary juxtaposition, like I should write a poem about it.

Man, Paul Newman and Charlton Heston in the same year.

Slumdog Millionaire, 6.

Hee, Danny Boyle. If more people did cartoon-character imitations for their kids during the ceremony, I don’t think the Oscars would have ratings issues.

I have to say this: the extended dance-mix nominee listings aren’t exactly concise, but they’re kind of nice.

Geez, Halle Berry, way to make your speech to Melissa Leo ABOUT YOURSELF.

I think I would like to be Australian.

Well, Kate Winslet, you completely deserve this, just for being fantastic all the time (and, it must be noted, in The Reader specifically. You’re a classy dame.

AWW HER DAD WHISTLED. See? Now I love Mr. Winslet, too.

Heh, did you see Anthony Hopkins when the camera panned by? He’s all, “Why, yes, I AM awesome! Thank you for noticing. …What, you mean I’m here for some other guy?”

What?! WHAT. You guys, you can nominate Sean Penn whenever you want. It’s not like he’s never going to do this again. MICKEY, YOU WERE ROBBED. Besides, wouldn’t you rather hear Mickey Rourke talk than Sean Penn? I mean, come ON.

Okay, Academy. The entire nation is peeing their pants right now, and also wanting to go to bed. This MAY not be the time for a montage. I guess you’re just sadistic like that. But I love the Milk score in the background.

Slumdog Millionaire, 7.

It’s been a pleasure. I’m out.

ETA: Apparently, I…missed one of Slumdog’s awards? How did that even happen? So:

Slumdog Millionaire, 8.

There you go.

Slumdog Millionaire, Oscars, Academy Awards, Best Picture, Slumdog Millionaire Best Picture, Queen Latifah, Paul Newman, Charlton Heston, Danny Boyle, Halle Berry, Melissa Leo, Kate Winslet, Anthony Hopkins, Sean Penn, Mickey Rourke, Best Actor, Best Actress

Jessica Biel, why are you telling me about the scientific Oscars? Isn’t this sort of akin to the time Denise Richards played a nuclear scientist in that really bad James Bond movie?

I…think this short film is Judd Apatow’s way of crashing the Oscars. You know, dude, if you made a good movie, you might get to go for real.

Seth Rogen, I try to think that you are not cute, and fail every time. Why can’t I quit you?

It is possible that the reason there are no Chuck ads during this telecast is that we’re not actually on NBC.

I feel like this musical number is either awesome, or a lot like the time Jack Donaghy wanted to have fireworks midtown Manhattan. As in, “that’s gonna scare a lot of people.” Maybe if they were in the shape of cowboy hats?

You know, I have no problem with Beyonce, but doesn’t she ever just have a normal day, where she doesn’t appear at any internationally-broadcast events?

Oh, Baz Luhrmann. You WOULD design enormous musical numbers for the Oscars. And that is why I love you sometimes.

I didn’t know that Kevin Kline had moved on to a second career. Who knew that being actor would prepare him so well to own the General Store in Frontierland?

Well. Heath Ledger. You deserve it, and it’s a shame you’re not here to enjoy it.

You know, Academy, I appreciate your attempt to draw people into the filmmaking process. I do. But mini-films about mini-films may not be the way to cut down the length of your telecast. Just saying.

Oh, cute French man, you are so, how you say, adorable? But you should not say “Shortest speech in Oscar history” and then continue speaking for three more minutes. And…did you just balance something on your face?

I love that Wanted was nominated for an Oscar. What a wonderful world, or something? I don’t know. (If you must know, it was for Best Sound Editing, and it lost, but hey

Slumdog Millionaire, 3.

Slumdog Millionaire, 4.

La la la, Jerry Lewis. When’s Hugh going to sing again?

Michael “Violins of Doom” Giacchino does music for entirely too many of my favorite things. Also, this music is lovely.

Slumdog Millionaire, 5.

This is crap. How do you not give a Best Score award to a movie with no dialogue?

Oy. We’re not even through the acting awards yet. WRAP IT UP, ACADEMY.

Awww, I sort of thought we’d get to skip the awkward Best Song numbers. Then I thought maybe M.I.A. would come out and rock all of our universes with a live version of “Paper Planes.” Wrong on both counts. Aaand I think I must not be paying close enough attention, because I don’t know who these people are or why they’re singing. Hmm.

Back for Act III.

Oscars, Academy Awards, Best Song, Slumdog Millionaire, James Franco, Judd Apatow, Seth Rogen, Jessica Biel, Beyonce, Baz Luhrmann, Kevin Kline, Best Supporting Actor, Best Supporting Actor Heath Ledger, Heath Ledger, Heath Ledger Joker, Wanted, Michael Giacchino, Jerry Lewis

Well, here we are. The Superbowl of the film year, only with more sequins and fewer beer commercials. Are we excited yet?

This year, in an attempt to counteract the downward ratings spiral that has been the Oscar ceremony of late, the Academy is introducing a set of top-secret changes to the telecast—so secret, in fact, that we at CH aren’t sure what they are, except for the baffling rumor that the actual awards will be given “in narrative form.” We’ll…see how that turns out.

Here we go, as they happen:

Good eeeeeevening, Hugh Jackman. Do you know what would make this telecast the best in Oscar history? If you busted out with a set of titanium(?) claws right now, before you’ve even ruined everything by opening your mouth. If that happened, I would totally watch again next year, automatically.

Uh, I loved Australia. Just saying.

Siiiiing, Hugh! I do love how this is starting out. Jon Stewart is sitting home right now, thinking, “IF ONLY I COULD SING.” Actually, he’s probably not watching.

I’ve got to slow down this posting rate.

Just one more thing: If I were going to the Oscars, I would do my hair just like Anne Hathaway’s, and wish that I could sing like her and then kiss a sexy Australian. So…Hathaway’s my hero?

I never quite get the Penelope Cruz buzz. I was going for Tomei, personally.

I want to hate this screenwriting set-up, but I can’t put “Tina Fey” and “hate” in the same sentence.

…Oops.

Someone must have encouraged the winners to go beyond the list of thanks this year, as part of the big overhaul. They may regret their decision later, but hey, it’ll give us something to hate on tomorrow. Or…why wait?

Slumdog Millionaire, 1.

Whoops, did I just Tivo through the Best Animated Shorts? I feel strangely guilty about this. It’s like how you skip the curling part of the Olympics, even though you know those sweeping, shouting athletic devotees are Olympians just like everyone else. (Again, just me?)

Robert Pattinson, I cannot handle you, and I don’t even want to think about you in conjunction with any kind of award. At all. Amanda Seyfried, you can stay.

Why does Ben Stiller always get roped into these things? Oy.

Except…heh.

Slumdog Millionaire, 2.

Aaaaand that’s Act I. Act II will be up in an hour or two, assuming that time has not actually slowed down for this ceremony.

Oscars, Academy Awards, Oscar liveblog, liveblogging the Oscars, Slumdog Millionaire, Hugh Jackman, Anne Hathaway, Robert Pattinson, Australia, Amanda Seyfried, Marisa Tomei, Penelope Cruz, Best Supporting Actress, Ben Stiller, Tina Fey

So, I don’t really know how to say this. I feel like, after what I’m about to say, I might be kicked out of the Association for Nice People, or the Society of Critics with Hearts, or possibly out of polite company as a whole. But here goes.

I’m rooting against Slumdog Millionaire for Best Picture.

I get that it’s a beacon of indie hope in the studio-driven desert that is Hollywood. I see that it’s an argument for hope and love in the midst of trying times. I’m on board with the concept and with the kids and with M.I.A. gettin’ down on the soundtrack, opening doors for crazy Sri Lankan girl rappers everywhere (you know, as you do). I liked it.

But what I really want to say is: really? Out of all of the films—large, small, blockbuster, under-the-radar—released to theatrical audiences in 2008, Slumdog Millionaire was the absolute best we could do?

If it wins, the victory will be from the heart—in the sense of “instead of the head.” It’s the only nominee with even a remotely hopeful message; it’s colorful and noisy and it’s about searching and finding when finding anything seems out of the question. In those terms, of course it’s popular: we as a culture need those things, especially now. There’s cultural value here. And it’s not that the movie isn’t good; it’s a snappy, high-concept story, brought to life by extraordinary child actors and committed to film gorgeously. If it succeeded financially, it also succeeded on its own terms: Danny Boyle set out to tell a fairytale, extravagantly, and he did it. Kudos to him.

But. Since when do Best Picture winners—ones we respect, not embarrassing ones like Crash or Titanic—have awkward moments in the way that Slumdog does? Since when are Best Pictures cheesy? It’s not that a Best Picture can’t or shouldn’t be vibrant and funny and romantic; heaven knows the Academy would do well to honor those things more often. But no Best Picture should be only those things. The best picture of the year should be the very best: a perfect storm of screenwriting and acting and directing and cinematography, graceful above all else. And Slumdog…well, it’s good, but it’s ungainly. It’s self-indulgent. It’s hopeful, but it’s also a trope—it’s not particularly true.

And so, on Sunday, we at CH be rooting for hope and happiness and love…but maybe not exactly for Slumdog Millionaire.

Oscars, Academy Awards, Oscar Week, Slumdog Millionaire, Best Picture, Danny Boyle

Hello and welcome to Oscar Week at CinemaHype.com—all week, we’ll be covering the run-up to the Academy Awards this Sunday. (Incidentally, this Sunday! Oscar season: sprint or marathon? Or, worse, both?) Put out the snacks, put your feet up, and start your betting pools. It’s time.

This year’s Oscar field is full of thorny questions, some of which we’ll be getting to this week. Today, we’re addressing one of the big ones, the kind of question that leaves its indelible mark on somebody’s legacy: will Heath Ledger win a posthumous Best Supporting Actor award for his performance as the Joker?

We at CH say: Yes, he will, and what’s more, he should.

First, as in most Oscar categories, it’s a matter of the competition. The other Best Supporting Actor nominees are fine actors who gave excellent performances in 2008. Individually, each of these guys could easily win, and heaven knows we at CH rarely bet against Philip Seymour Hoffman. But, among this field, the Joker is the role that comes the closest to carrying a film—fore better or for worse, it’s the closest to being a leading-man role. A villainous leading man, for sure, but Ledger carried The Dark Knight largely on his crooked shoulders. He makes the movie, in a way that isn’t true for, say, Robert Downey, Jr. in Tropic Thunder or Josh Brolin in Milk.

Does his passing increase his chances of winning? Maybe it’s crude, but…sure. Of course it does. Ledger was potentially one of the greatest actors of his generation—this is the Academy’s last chance to acknowledge his career, which already includes a snub for Best Actor in Brokeback Mountain. Additionally, any actor’s final complete performance (Ledger was in the middle filming of The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus when he passed away) is likely to be scrutinized with extra care, and Ledger’s performance in The Dark Knight was so heavily hyped and so universally praised that it would be difficult to ignore under any circumstances.

But the question stands: Regardless of Ledger’s life and death offscreen, does this particular performance deserve to win? The straight-up answer is yes. Maybe the Joker is a show-off role, the kind of part that can make anybody look good; lots of crazy-person roles function this way. But the bombastic nature of the part doesn’t diminish Ledger’s performance. It’s not so much that he disappears into the Joker as that he takes him on, all the little tics that come with him, until his face paint isn’t so much a mask as his face as we know it. And THAT is a worth an Oscar.

Oscars, Academy Awards, Heath Ledger, The Dark Knight, Joker, Best Supporting Actor, Josh Brolin, Milk, Robert Downey Jr., Tropic Thunder

Well, I’m just going to come out and say it: I wasn’t sure Anne Hathaway had it in her. I had hope, but then, I have also hoped for a pony and for cable TV and for Orlando Bloom to arrive on my doorstep with a single red rose, and…well.

Imagine my surprise, then—surprise of the pleasant variety—at coming out of Rachel Getting Married with the distinct sense that Hathaway deserves her Academy Award nomination 100 percent. I don’t know whether she’s been holding out on us, or whether she’s just growing into her creative self, but her performance is really that good. It’s, well…kind of astonishing, frankly. In a good way.

It helps that Jenny Lumet’s script gives her a good jumping-off place, mostly free of unintentional cringe moments. Hathaway’s character, Kim—a drug addict just released from rehab—is confused and utterly self-centered and weighed down with a Mack truck full of family guilt, among other things. She only talks about herself, even when the conversation isn’t about her; she fakes good intentions, or maybe has good intentions, poorly carried out; she’s unpredictable in frightening ways when her personal routine is interrupted. But—and this is the most important thing—none of the ropes and pulleys of Hathaway’s performance are visible, and none of her heavy-lifting scenes feel overblown. She looks more like a skilled actress working with a meaty script than like a starlet gunning for an Oscar, and that’s no mean feat here. She’s also surrounded by strong supporting characters: Kim may be the most obvious screw-up in her family, but the titular Rachel (Rosemarie DeWitt) is none too sympathetic either, and the girls’ parents are both convincing in their varying degrees of awfulness.

The main problem with the movie lies in the direction, and in the pacing of scenes. Maybe it’s a Jonathan Demme thing (think The Manchurian Candidate and Beloved), but a few major scenes border on ridiculously long, going and going and going without payoff or structure—do we really need to hear all of the speeches made by unnamed characters at the rehearsal dinner? There’s a sense of confusion between “small-scale family drama” and “wedding documentary” that doesn’t work, or maybe a lack of priorities, as if somehow the culture of this particular wedding is more important than the beats of the story. And let me just say: it isn’t. We need those beats.

But these are small annoyances in an otherwise precise movie, full of strong supporting performances and showing Hathaway off completely. Rachel Getting Married should be in theaters until Oscar time (February 22), and Hathaway’s performance is not to be missed.

Rachel Getting Married, Anne Hathaway, Rosemarie DeWitt, Jonathan Demme, Oscars, Best Actress, Best Actress nominees

Do you think the Academy knows that half of their viewers are only in it for the clothes?

Lots of people, aside from the ones who are a) nerdy and care who wins or b) betting on the outcome, would probably rather tune in to the E! red-carpet special and watch Joan and Melissa Rivers do their embarrassing-question shtick than, you know, actually watch the ceremony. It sounds shallow (okay, it is shallow), but: who doesn’t remember the Dead Swan dress? Or, alternatively, the time Renee Zellweger blew everyone out of the water by wearing yellow (like nobody had ever thought of it before)? Even if you don’t know exactly what I’m talking about, chances are an InStyle reader in your vicinity would.

And yet, for being as fashion-obsessed as the Oscars are, there’s remarkably little buzz about the actual clotheshorse category: Achievement in Costume Design. Here’s a look at the costume-design nominees for 2009:

Australia (20th Century Fox), Catherine Martin

Is it possible—and I’m just throwing this out there—that a few voters confused “costume design” with “making Hugh Jackman look as scrumptiously manly as possible”? Because, if that’s what we’re talking about, AUTOMATIC WIN. Otherwise, I have no memory of the clothing in this movie. Lots of riding breeches, I suppose. And…a party dress? Maybe?

The Curious Case of Benjamin Button (Paramount and Warner Bros.), Jacqueline West

Remember, we never bet against Cate Blanchett.

The Duchess (Paramount Vantage, Pathé and BBC Films), Michael O’Connor

Big dresses. Natch.

* Milk (Focus Features), Danny Glicker

What they really mean to say is, “Bitchin’ glasses, Emile.”

* Revolutionary Road (DreamWorks, Distributed by Paramount Vantage), Albert Wolsky

It is possible that I would pay money to see a runway walk-off between Kate Winslet and Mad Men’s January Jones. Let’s keep the shirtwaist dresses flouncy, the heels tall, and the pearls shiny, ladies. Ooh, and you can charge extra if David Bowie referees.

Oscars, costume design, Australia, Milk, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button, The Duchess, Revolutionary Road

Remember the early ’00s, when happy movies were all the rage? When we’d all go to the drive-in and pay 50 cents for a malted and with our best girls, and Chicago and The Return of the King won Best Picture? Those were the days. But wait: even now, as we’re deep into awards-show season and even deeper into national-consciousness territory, maybe we haven’t dropped completely out of the range of whimsy. After all, we’ve got Slumdog Millionaire.

The premise of Slumdog Millionaire is fun: an eighteen-year-old boy from the slums of Mumbai competes on an episode of Who Wants to Be a Millionaire?. How he came to be there, and how he knows each answer, comes out in the course of the movie. The story is full of tiny coincidences, but that’s okay—suspension of disbelief is part of the deal (if you’re looking for deadly realism, go see The Wrestler or Revolutionary Road; cynicism won’t help you here). It’s a high-concept premise, and it all clicks neatly into place, and although tidy endings may be out of fashion, writer Simon Beaufoy and director Danny Boyle pull this one off confidently.

But then there’s Slumdog Millionaire awards fever—sweeping victories at the Golden Globes. Whether this movie deserves the glory, laud, and honor it’s getting depends on how strongly you believe in Boyle’s fairy-tale vision and how much you’re willing to overlook in its service. It’s a good movie—good because it’s creative, and because it develops a strong emotional story, and because it doesn’t waver from the sensibility it’s trying to create. It’s also loopy and cheesy and a little predictable. And maybe those things are part of its fabric, part of its charm, but that doesn’t mean they aren’t there. Boyle fans, and people who just want to see something work out for once will be able to enjoy the cheese. Other people—those without hearts, Boyle might say—just…won’t.

Beaufoy and Boyle are the minds behind Slumdog Millionaire, but lucky (or skilled) casting makes them look good, as well. Each of the main characters is played by three different actors of approximately elementary, junior high, and high-school age. The potential for awkwardness here is tremendous, and almost totally unrealized—the performances, even of the very young actors, are uniformly excellent. Dev Patel is a graceful male lead, considering he looks a little like an Indian Michael Phelps (those ears!); perhaps even more significantly, we can expect to see his love interest, Freida Pinto, plastered everywhere for the foreseeable future. She’s just that pretty. In all cases, expect to see these kids again, charming the pants (or, as the case may be, tourist dollars) off of audiences for years to come.

Slumdog Millionaire is this year’s bandwagon movie—the one that everybody loves, and that may be a bit of a head-scratcher in retrospect. Boyle and Beaufoy have created something different, something of relative quality that gives audiences a break from the downers filling the theaters, and for that they are (and should be) thanked. The sensation may not last, but we can enjoy it while we can.

Slumdog Millionaire, Danny Boyle, Simon Beaufoy, Dev Patel, Freida Pinto

You’ll hear a lot of things about The Wrestler. You’ll hear that it’s kissing cousins with Million Dollar Baby, or maybe The Passion of the Christ (with an extra layer of Spandex). You’ll hear that it’s Mickey Rourke’s star re-maker. You’ll hear that it’s sad, that it’s depressing, that it’s hard to watch. These things are all true, or nearly true. But they don’t get at the heart of the movie, which is that essential, burning question of the 80s: is it better to burn out or fade away?

With a different cast, The Wrestler would still be good, but probably unheralded. With the exception of the wrestling scenes, it’s a soft, sad movie, the story of a man all too aware of his own decline—not a crowd-pleaser, maybe, but certainly resonant. Robert D. Siegel’s script threatens to get self-indulgent but mostly stays afloat—the ending is especially good—and Darren Aronofsky’s directing plays up its high points. They’re not very high, those heights, but it’s nice to see them acknowledged anyway.

The heart of the movie, what brings The Wrestler into the light, and into the awards-show arena at all, is Rourke. He’s basically living his own comeback story via his performance (so meta!): actor-turned-boxer loses both careers, then finds possible ticket back to glory. The rest of his story is going to work out for the best; he will likely win an Academy Award for his performance, and it will mostly be for the right reasons. His gentleness, his sense of resignation, are palpable, even as he lights up in the presence of others. In fact, it’s hard to say whether Randy’s spark comes from his own pleasure at the company of other people, or Rourke’s pleasure at the company of other actors. Either way, many of the most memorable scenes in the movie show Randy interacting with the strangers around him—seeing his ease with the people he doesn’t know (and his unease with some of the people he does know), it’s easy to believe that he’s done wrong, but it’s just as easy to believe that he wants to do right.

Standing in Rourke’s comback-kid shadow is Marisa Tomei, who gives a lifetime-caliber performance as the one person willing to come to Randy’s rescue, with questionable results. The character is, perhaps, cliched—stripper just trying to get by, possibly with a golden heart—but the way Tomei inhabits her feels real and dredges up some hope at a point where hope is lacking (with no promise, of course, that hope is fulfilled). An Academy Award would not be mis-bestowed on her, though Rourke may be the only winner this year. Less impressive is Evan Rachel Wood as Randy’s estranged daughter, who storms in and out of every scene without ever saying why.

The Wrestler isn’t a Best Picture kind of movie—performances aside, it’s not spectacular enough for that. But it’s very good, and it’s beautifully played by all.

The Wrestler, Mickey Rourke, Marisa Tomei, Evan Rachel Wood, Robert D. Siegel, Darren Aronofsky, Academy Awards

So…what one might call “CH Official critical thoughts on the Golden Globe Awards” might actually just be “me making catty remarks about celebrities.” But there you go. Like you wouldn’t do the same, were you, you know….watching. Sarcasm: it’s the grumpy man’s wit.

On with the show!

- Uh, wow, Sting. Can we introduce you to Cast Away-era Tom Hanks? I feel like you guys might have a lot to talk about. I’ll just go get my time machine.

- The Jonas Brothers: “We’ve never seen so many celebrities in our lives!” By which they mean, since they watched last year’s Golden Globes…in the womb.

- I completely love Drew Barrymore’s gown. But when did the Grey Gardens remake become an HBO thing? Probably for the best, really. You can’t fictionalize this stuff:

- Aww, Kate Winslet, you are adorable, and I suppose that if I won double Golden Globes for being utterly dramatic, I’d never be in any comedies either. Did you take Cute Speech lessons from America Ferrara?

- Nobody is surprised by Mickey Rourke, I suspect, except maybe Mickey Rourke, which is the most charming thing of all.

- This is not a cinema thing, per se, but I am so happy for (writer/Doyle from Gilmore Girls) Danny Strong’s success with Recount. He just makes me happy, okay?

- Renee Zellweger: Sharon Stone called. She wants herself back.

- I LIKE YOU TINA FEY AND I AM ON THE INTERNET. PLEASE GIVE ME A JOB AND BE MY BFF. SIGNED, LIZ AT CINEMAHYPE.

Oh, Golden Globes. You are…less interesting than you think. But hey, thanks for showing up this year.

Golden Globes, awards, Sting, Tom Hanks, Kate Winslet, Renee Zellweger, Sharon Stone, Jonas Brothers, America Ferrara, Danny Strong, Mickey Rourke, Drew Barrymore, Grey Gardens

BEST MOTION PICTURE, DRAMA

* The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
* Frost/Nixon
* The Reader
* Revolutionary Road
* Slumdog Millionaire

BEST MOTION PICTURE, COMEDY

* Burn After Reading
* Happy-Go-Lucky
* In Bruges
* Mamma Mia!
* Vicky Cristina Barcelona

ACTOR, DRAMA

* Leonardo DiCaprio, Revolutionary Road
* Frank Langella, Frost/Nixon
* Sean Penn, Milk
* Brad Pitt, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
* Mickey Rourke, The Wrestler

ACTRESS, DRAMA

* Anne Hathaway, Rachel Getting Married
* Angelina Jolie, Changeling
* Meryl Streep, Doubt
* Kristin Scott Thomas, I’ve Loved You So Long
* Kate Winslet, Revolutionary Road

ACTOR, COMEDY OR MUSICAL

* Javier Bardem, Vicky Cristina Barcelona
*Colin Farrell, In Bruges
* James Franco, Pineapple Express
* Brendan Gleeson, In Bruges
* Dustin Hoffman, Last Chance Harvey

ACTRESS, COMEDY OR MUSICAL

* Rebecca Hall, Vicky Cristina Barcelona
* Sally Hawkins, Happy-Go-Lucky
* Frances McDormand, Burn After Reading
* Meryl Streep, Mamma Mia!
* Emma Thompson, Last Chance Harvey

SUPPORTING ACTOR

* Tom Cruise, Tropic Thunder
* Robert Downey Jr., Tropic Thunder
* Ralph Fiennes, The Duchess
* Philip Seymour Hoffman, Doubt
* Heath Ledger, The Dark Knight

SUPPORTING ACTRESS

* Amy Adams, Doubt
* Penélope Cruz, Vicky Cristina Barcelona
* Viola Davis, Doubt
* Marisa Tomei, The Wrestler
* Kate Winslet, The Reader

DIRECTOR

* Danny Boyle, Slumdog Millionaire
* Stephen Daldry, The Reader
* David Fincher, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
* Ron Howard, Frost/Nixon
* Sam Mendes, Revolutionary Road

SCREENPLAY

* Simon Beaufoy, Slumdog Millionaire
* David Hare, The Reader
* Peter Morgan, Frost/Nixon
* Eric Roth, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
* John Patrick Shanley, Doubt

FOREIGN LANGUAGE FILM

* The Baader Meinhof Complex (Germany)
* Everlasting Moments (Sweden)
* Gomorrah (Italy)
* I’ve Loved You So Long (France)
* Waltz With Bashir (Israel)

ANIMATED FEATURE FILM

* Bolt
* Kung Fu Panda
* WALL-E

ORIGINAL SCORE

* Alexandre Desplat, The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
* Clint Eastwood, Changeling
* James Newton Howard, Defiance
* A.R. Rahman, Slumdog Millionaire
* Hans Zimmer, Frost/Nixon

ORIGINAL SONG

* “Down to Earth,” WALL-E; music by Peter Gabriel, Thomas Newman; lyrics by Peter Gabriel
* “Gran Torino,” Gran Torino; music by Clint Eastwood, Jamie Cullum, Kyle Eastwood, Michael Stevens; lyrics by Kyle Eastwood, Michael Stevens
* “I Thought I Lost You,” Bolt; music & lyrics by Miley Cyrus, Jeffrey Steele
* “Once in a Lifetime,” Cadillac Records; music & lyrics by Beyoncé Knowles, Amanda Ghost, Scott McFarnon, Ian Dench, James Dring, Jody Street
* “The Wrestler,” The Wrestler; music & lyrics by Bruce Springsteen

awards, golden globes, golden globe results, golden globe winners

Well, this is awkward: for a brief period on Thursday, the Hollywood Foreign Press Association website labeled Anne Hathaway as the winner of the not-yet-awarded Golden Globe for Best Actress in a Motion Picture (Drama). The HPFA immediately removed the result and then backpedaled, claiming that the citation may have been wrong. Nobody knows whether the mistake a) was actually a mistake, or b) will change anything about Sunday night’s results.

anne hathaway, anne hathaway golden globe, golden globes

In the mean time, Hathaway is presumably practicing both the Ecstatic Speech-and-Cry as well as the Respectful Gaze of the Graceful Loser. As well she should.

Yesterday was a magical day in movieland: if the day after Halloween is (these days) the capitalist kick-off for Christmas, yesterday was the beginning of the pre-pre-pre-Oscar season. I’m talking, of course, about the Golden Globe nominations, which came out Thursday morning. This is it, movie-wise, for this year. All the big stuff’s going to come in one big flood of pretense and (hopefully) excitement. So if you’ve been waiting for all the really good movies to come out—if you’re one of those “if you see one movie this year…” people—this is your time. Go forth and view!

Of course, quite a few of the nominees haven’t even been released yet. What’s a blogger to do? Rather than give my final, systematic predictions now, when so many of the nominated movies haven’t hit theaters, I’m erring on the side of a) knowing what I’m talking about (enjoy it while it lasts) and b) nonchalance. You know, commenting only where comments are warranted, like everyone else.

Like so:

- Kate Winslet’s doubled up on nominations; she’s up for Best Actress (Drama) for Revolutionary Road and for Best Supporting Actress for The Reader. Good news: Winslet rules basically 100% of the time. Bad news: Winslet hasn’t cracked a smile on camera since 1997. Maybe Jack’s death really stuck with her, you know? Or maybe she just wishes she’d hung on to that necklace.

- In Bruges? Was that this year?

- Speaking of, Colin Farrell up for an acting award? This, I’ve got to see.

- I see where they’re going with the whole nominating-Mamma Mia! thing. I get it. It was fun; it was successful; everybody liked it. I liked it. If it wins Best Comedy or Musical, SOMEBODY’S GOING DOWN.

- Since when is The Joker a supporting role in The Dark Knight? That was his movie, guys, and I’m pretty sure a certain someone would back me up on that.

- Tropic Thunder for—count ‘em—two acting awards? And yet, I totally see it. I’d vote for Tom Cruise if it wasn’t so futile (see above). He was the best part, and I say that in full awareness that my man RDJ was also present.

- This critic is maybe possibly really really excited about Frost/Nixon. OH MAN political drama written for the stage! (I’m sorry. Did you think I was cool?)

- Sometimes it’s just the same folks over and over, isn’t it? Sigh.

More to come. In the mean time, have a good weekend. See a movie for me, will you?

Golden Globes, Golden Globe nominees